Menopause - the toll it takes

Its a right bummer when your body shape starts to change and you have no control over it. 

For a woman like me who has always exercised moderately, been able to eat without having to give too much thought to it. Been realistic in my food intake, all things healthy and fresh not frozen, in a tin or out of a packet; to find that despite limiting myself more than I have had to, I am gaining weight. My waist is no longer obvious, the reasonably flat stomach now protrudes, the thighs have dimples and cellulite and my knees are no longer without that bulge of fat that seems to just hang about above the knee cap. And as for upper arms well we won't go there. And that feeling you get when you catch yourself in the mirror particularly the back view and you wonder who is that woman, I don't recognise her.

Well that is me and it is taking a bit to come to terms with the new me. The older me, an alien version of the woman I was until the last couple of years, has robbed me of that woman. And the new me has less energy, less tolerance to alcohol and less desire to drink it, an interest in chocolate that I couldn't give a hoot about before, less tolerance for too much meat - it gives me constipation.

My mind wanders and my memory fails me. Occasionally, I have really wondered if I am getting early onset dementia. Words I want to use just won't come into my mind or out of my mouth. I am stiff in the morning and it takes a while to loosen up after I have waddled to the kitchen to make the first cup of tea.  My skin is so dry that it flakes like dandruff, I pull off fitted trousers some evenings and the inside of the legs have tiny flakes of skin attached, so I have to moisturise morning and night. And there are a few other problems that are too personal to mention, but they involve thinning skin.

I have taken HRT medications for quite a few years until the doctor and I decided as I am menopausal it is probably time to stop and let nature takes it course. Thank god for the occasional IPL or there would be another out of control problem. And none of these treatments come cheap, you find yourself between a rock and a hard place. I find myself being over critical of everything about me, impossible to satisfy.

They say ageing is a journey, I feel like I'm on a slippery slope going only one way.

In the Outdoors Discovering Rimutaka Incline Walk

In March I decided it was time to get back on the bike and get fit, loose weight, all the usual reasons for trying to be active in many different ways, however, day two into the new regime after work, disaster struck. 

I left home around 7.00pm to go cycling, too late but an appointment for work kept me delayed and I didn't want to miss a lovely evening out on the bike. At 7.30pm I cycled out from under some trees straight into the sun and was blinded, disorientated I cycled straight into a low barrier post. Not going fast the impact still had serious repercussions; my left shoulder impacted with the handlebars on the way through smashing my clavicle and I landed about 2 metres on gravel on my back. Stunned I got up and a lovely bystander came to my rescue and drove me home. To cut a very long and painful story very short, after three weeks I had surgery to plate the bones, about a nine inch cut and immobile in a sling for 6 weeks. Later I discovered I now have two rotator cuff tears, pain in both shoulders, only able to sleep on my back and a long 18 month wait to have the plate removed before any further repairs can be undertaken.

Before all this happened  I had booked a couple of weeks holiday in mid May to Bangkok and Phuket for rest and recovery.  Just out of the sling by two days we flew to Bangkok and arrived two days before the military coup. We took daily massages and really indulged in lying back and being pampered. The only real sightseeing we did was to take a driver and head north to visit the River Kwai. A trip we had not included in previous trips to Thailand and one we were pleased we did this time. How people endured such conditions one cannot imagine or wish to ever see people experience again.

Phuket was just pure indulgence, we stayed at Mangosteen Resort and Spa, with lovely big villas for each couple, children not permitted, cocktails after 3pm and a nice indoor/outdoor restaurant. We ate seafood fresh from the sea, buy it at the market and take 5 steps into a local restaurant to have it cooked and served to your table. Again we had massages daily down at the seafront. As it was low season everything was very negotiable. Like all good things it came to an end when we arrived on May 29th. I had celebrated my 56th birthday during the vacation.

We popped a night in Wellington into the mix to be part of the Freddy Mercury tribute night at the Michael Fowler Centre, three rows from the front it was a great show.

Saturday in late June dawned a beautiful day and hubby suggested we might like to have a day out. I readily agreed as my activities had been pretty limited for four months, just walking a few kilometres after work around the walkways. After a bit of googling we settled on walking the Rimutaka Incline Walk. It was a bit late when we finally set off from home, but we agreed we would walk as far as it was reasonable to enable us to return to the car before it became cold. 

We left the carpark at Cross Creek at 11am and finally got to the summit, after a stop for a cuppa after an hour, at 1.00pm. We did not meet another walker on the way but plenty of mountain bikers cycled uphill past us. We found a table and enjoyed our lunch with another cup of tea. The day was stunning, sunshine, no clouds, no wind which is pretty special if you know that area. There is so much wind normally that there are signs warning you of the cold southerly wind and to be prepared. I walked much of the way in a tee-shirt as I had become too warm with my merino on.

The tunnels along the way are an amazing piece of engineering and there are plenty of information posts telling you of the men killed due to rock falls and explosions. It was clearly a harsh environment in which to make a living but you also read of the camaraderie that endured and the lifelong friendships made. It was from the accounts a social place to live Cross Creek and the remnants of a tennis court can be seen near the Cross Creek Station.

After lunch we decided to walk for another half hour. The path on the Upper Hutt side is wide, level and well cared for, the Rimutaka side is rougher and more challenging. The Hutt side you could push a stroller on but the Rimutaka side is impossible, particularly where the washout occurred, there it is recommended you dismount your bike and only a foolhardy person would not follow the instructions.

We walked for another two kilometres then turned back. The return walk was easy if not a little jarring on the knees as you are all downhill from the Summit. The wind never came up, the sun stayed out and by the time we returned to our car we had walked 18kms and never saw another walker. 

It was so nice to discover a part of the Wairarapa I had not seen before, to read the history and be encouraged to get out and experience the hidden treasures. 

I made a silent commitment to take up tramping again once I have had the knee surgery. Just another little operation I am waiting for.

Over Christmas

Well Christmas is over and it has been a lovely time with family. 

The Twelve Nights of Christmas was blessed with wonderful weather, some evenings were so balmy it was like being in the tropics, uncanny. We did have a couple of cold nights but we still stayed outside in our fabulous new town square, the only night inside was the final night which I sadly missed as I was on my way to Auckland. Feedback has been so positive that I am committed to making this happen annually and with more time to plan expanding on the great start. I was fortunate to be surrounded by amazingly talented people who came on board to make it happen including my passionate staff and district councillors.

This was Day One and the crowds only grew with each event. For me the evening with Wairarapa Word, a night of storytelling, poems and music was a gem. I discovered we are surrounded by the most amazingly talented authors who are quietly going about their lives, many living a sustainable lifestyle and successfully writing for publication. Gared Julian from Moon Over Martinborough participated and listening to his lyrical voice read from his book was a highlight. I plan to attend their Sunday sessions in future.

Xmas was with my adorable son and his partner in the big smoke. I cooked a late lunch all from the Christmas edition of NZ House and Garden and it was as good as any restaurant would serve up. We enjoyed a roasted pear and glazed ham platter, potato and bean salad with herb dressing and caramelised beetroot with cashew nuts and blue cheese. I changed the beetroot recipe slightly to accommodate the ingredients I had and the cheese that Hailey kindly left in her fridge for us. We finished it all off with a lemon tart and an organic vanilla seed custard. Xmas mince pies and marshmallow treats all home made of course. The xmas cake was not cut for a couple of days as we had over indulged. We had enjoyed a breakfast with our sons in-laws earlier in the day and then had a lovely dinner with them the following day.  The weather was very unkind over Christmas/New Year so our plans for Boxing Day races and days at the beach never eventuated.

Enjoyed a lovely overnighter at Taupo on the way up. Sitting on the lake foreshore with a cold wine after a 4 hour drive was divine.

Once home we decided it was time to turn some plans and dreams into a reality. The first was my desire for hens. A hen house was constructed by my hubbie and is awaiting the delivery of four Araucana hens on Sunday. He has taken great pride in adding bespoke features.

I have been gardening in my time off but the wind the last few days has been heart breaking. Nothing is every allowed to be easy is it?

On a personal level I have been struggling with pain from two rotator cuff injuries, one in each shoulder obviously. ACC, the provider of injury care and welfare. Not my experience at all.  I had my first shoulder claim accepted but the necessary surgery claim declined so in December 2012 I appealed their decision. It has been twelve months of hell while they postpone hearings, withhold information, fail to respond to correspondence and meanwhile my injury is deteriorating. Then as you overuse your other arm I heard the left shoulder tear when opening a cabinet that had a sticky door. Well that really became a challenge for ACC,  two claims, they simply couldn't accept their was a second injury. Nearly another twelve months have passed while they request information from the GP who has now sent the same documentation three times. Requesting an ultrasound took months and finally the GP rang them and asked what was the problem, no explanation was forthcoming and no apology for incompetence. Finally I have an appointment to see the surgeon in late January, not holding my breath as it all turned to custard with the right shoulder so only anticipate the same for the left. Meanwhile you are expected to live on pain killers and anti-inflammatories. Too bad if you suffer side effects and fundamentally do not agree with propping up your life with pills. 

I decided this morning after another terrible night of pain and feeling like crap this morning that it is time I lodged a complaint with the Ombudsmans Office.  New years resolution!! Who ever keeps those? But we can share our sentiments.

You know if we are forced by legislation to only use the governments accident  injury insurer then the least they can do is provide the cover. Otherwise, many of us would opt out and pay for a policy that actually did what we had paid for.  We can only hope the pendulum will swing back and the decision makers at ACC will moderate their application of policy to enable claimants to receive adequate and appropriate cover. Very few claims are fraudulent so why should all of us suffer because of so few.

Life's Like That

Just watched NZ's Got Talent and our local lad Cruize made us all proud by being placed 6th in the final. Cannot wait to hear him sing at our first night of the Twelve Nights Of Christmas, Friday at the Town Square. I hope I have covered off all that could go wrong, apart from the weather that I have no control of, and the forecast is for showers. Murphys law. I have put out some media releases and the one they used and have repeated is the one that I made a terrible cheesy comment in. I cringe every time I read it. I am following my own advice - surround yourself by the best people, my staff are wonderful and rise to every occasion I put before them. When every other local organisation is winding down for Christmas we are winding up.  Then we just get over Xmas and it is the January school holiday programme.

I went to a workshop last week on mentoring. It was different to what I anticipated, the secret is you sit and do not react to every participants version of what they would do in the situation you have described. The participants or peer mentors cannot ask questions, must take turns to talk and not interrupt another speaker, in one of the mentoring codes of practise, you share negative comments and then follow it with positive comments. When you sit and listen to criticism you feel angry but after listening to positive feedback the anger dissolves and the outcome is you take a balanced approach to their comments.

I have kept myself busy this weekend planting some more veg seedlings and making xmas treats. Two xmas cakes, one for the family and the other to share at a shared dinner for the resource centre, and chocolate truffles with marshmallow centres. 
Oh and popped in a xmas parade on saturday, the float was for JNS and was one of 30. I was pleasantly surprised how many businesses and groups entered and a crowd turned out to watch with hands out for lollies.

But despite being busy I have this empty feeling in my gut. Something is missing and I haven't yet found it.

I've Been Busy

Well I have been to a Trust meeting and several inductions. Certainly have a lot to learn but it is a challenge I am up for.  I am particularly interested in how the earnings can be used to benefit our educational institutions and in turn our young people.

Last weekend was the Garden Tour sponsored by Pukaha Mount Bruce and of course they are the recipients of the proceeds. Again, they had a good number of country gardens on the tour and these are of special interest to me. 

Bumblebees were everywhere, big ones, small ones and medium size bumbles all busy pollinating flowers and fruits. I just love their sound and flitty habits.  I managed to capture a very small butterfly, monarch I think, on a beautiful peony rose.

We visited one garden that has gypsy caravans that are for rent. Mary the owner is very creative and has a flair for design, which was so apparent in her furnishings.

Are they not just most romantic accommodation you have seen? Beds in one van, bathroom in one end, kitchen in another. 

Outdoor dunny, but with style.

And the most relaxing outdoor bath with a fire under it. Don't forget the bubbles, they think of everything.

I loved the garden below with the endless box hedging.  I went to this property four years ago when it was just built and there was virtually no garden.  Now look at it.

Lyn clearly buys very mature buxus when developing the beds.  I love it but I would not like the endless clipping, when I was 10 years younger, but not now.

The last couple of days we have had the haymakers working on our land and the neighbouring sections.

It is now 8.30pm and they are really trying to get the job done. This is only 30 metres from my lounge, but oh so interesting.

Today was an interesting day locally.  I was one of many who were the audience at a public meeting hosted by the local district health board.  They were trying to reassure people that the local hospital will not close, however, they made it clear the services are to be rationalised between the three DHBs in the greater Wellington region. Surgery that may result in complications will be sent to a larger hospital and don't live to be over 85 years as your chances of care will be limited to medication and pastoral care. But the good news is there will be a stronger focus on preventative care and community nursing. The facts are there is simply not enough money.

We are to have a series of christmas events in our new town square. An opportunity for families to celebrate xmas together along with friends, neighbours, colleagues and anyone  else who happens to be there.  It has been a bit of an exercise getting the consents and funding has been a whole nightmare of its own. But we are now advertising for stallholders and buskers, we have a pretty full programme of performers. All part of the job and so much fun.

Christmas joy set to fill square

Sausage Making

What a wonderful way to spend a Saturday afternoon, sausage making with expert tutors from UCOL. 
My lovely daughter gave me a sausage maker last xmas but I had not taken the next step and given sausage making a go. I thought I needed to buy cuts of meat to grind and I was worried it would be too hard with my damaged shoulders.  But no, the experts simply order the mince ground at 6mm from their butcher, how easy is that. 
The hardest part of the whole process is deciding the flavours you want. We made beef with beetroot chutney and lamb with minted peas.
The Sausage Class - part one.

And once we had mastered putting the skins onto the sausage press we made some to take home.

Using the Sausage Press

I am committed to buying a press, apparently they are readily available online.  Be another trade me purchase no doubt. Just took all the effort out of it.

And then of course the most difficult part of the whole process is the tying off and I captured all on video so I can watch and practise.

Creating the string of sausages

So we had a go in groups of 3 or 4 but in our case we had a group of 5, which at the end of the workshop meant we took home less sausages each, but hey it was a great afternoon.

Having a Go


Hubby wasn't that practised at getting the skin on the grinder but it is not easy first time  -says me who only videoed and did not actually make anything.  But of course I am confident if left to my own devices I will quickly become expert and confident.

Hubby puts the skin on the grinder

As a group we really did very well, I thought they looked very professional

Didn't we do well

The UCOL chef vacuumed packed the sausages for us all to take home.  Ours went straight into the fridge and were dinner saturday night and sunday night. They were the best sausies I have eaten maybe ever.

I cannot wait to show my son how to do it.  When he returned from living in the UK he rang me one evening from Auckland, I am in Wairarapa and asked where he could buy a proper sausage. I told him to drive to Cockle Bay butchers which he did and while he said they were not bad sausies, they were not a patch on british ones.  Well once I demonstrate this easy technique to him he can make quality sausages to his hearts content.  And you know it is much cheaper. Finding a butcher that stocks the skins may be a challenge but in Masterton Export Meats stocks them and I gather the Mad Butcher also stocks them nationwide.

Cooking With Foruged Foods

 Well I have now completed my Kokomai - Wairarapa Arts Festival - activities. I have enjoyed Cooking with Foruged Foods by Antony; michelin trained chef from London who now owns Wakelin House in Greytown. 
It was such a treat to be part of four participants who paid a modest $67 to be part of the workshop. 
The four trainee chefs!! did the prep and Antony did the cooking.

Firstly we had to identify foruged greens that Antony had collected from his Featherston Farmlet and some of it he collected from the garden at the rear of the restaurant.

 Meanwhile outside the library next door childrens theatre aound pirates was taking place.

So we did the preparation which including grating cheese, chopping wild fennel and mushrooms.

Our first recipe was panna cotta made with wild fennel and a fennel syrup.  I can tell you it was to die for.

Here we made a salsa of wild onion, olive oil and garlic. And as the photos below show we also made a mushroom sauce with cream, garlic, butter and loads of cream to accompany gnocchi.

We used only the best ingredient, organic egg yolks and local cheeses.

Every chef recommends the best mixing method is clean hands.

I thought gnocchi was one of the mysterious things that only experienced cooks could make. How wrong I was, it was the easiest recipe and to get the markings you place a small amount on the fork prongs and roll it off with your thumb.

Here is the onion weed salsa, easy and so tasty and from something most people consider a noxious weed.

 The gnocchi was cooked in hot salted water and then fried which is an option to brown but not essential. 

Our day concluded with us eating all that we made and was washed down with a lovely local pino gris. I have been left inspired to start using what until now I considered weeds, after all how many of you have battled with wild onion. Use it as a cooking ingredient in salsas, in place of onions and great as a stuffing ingredient.

Wakelin House, Main Street, Greytown. Inside is a beautiful restaurant, open fire, white tablecloths, silver service, top class. And a menu full of foruged local foods.